The Real Beauty & The Beast

This pep talk goes out to every living, breathing human being ...

YOU. ARE. LOVED.

YOU. ARE. BEAUTIFUL (HANDSOME).

Hello??

"Do you understand the words that are coming outta my mouth??"

I have absolutely had it with the bullies in this world.  Whenever I encounter a sincerely mean person, I so badly want to smack them upside the head and say, "Excuse me!  Can't you see that you are literally sucking the life out of this person?"  But the shyness in me wins out every time.  I swallow my fight, and usually walk away.  How terrible is that?  I want to have the strength to stand up for people and not care at all what might happen to me.  People don't deserve to be treated this way.  God did not make human beings just so they can rip each others' souls apart and leave them out to dry.  Geesh.  I'm ranting, I know.  But I just feel so strongly about this, and it's time we change the world.

Calling all World Changers!

Let's stand up for each other.  Let's be nice to people... yes, even people we may not like very much.  They still have feelings and troubles of their own.  Just think, the simplest gesture like smiling at someone can change their attitude about the day.    

I can honestly say that I have never been truly bullied, but there have been many instances in my life that have knocked me down and made me feel less than the scum on the earth for a long time.  Now that I'm an adult, I see it all so clearly ... people can be straight up mean.  Why do people feel the need to make someone else feel so terrible?

Friends, let's start spreading goodness and not hatred.  Let's build each other up, because the good Lord knows that words can do some serious damage.  Let's remind others every chance we get about how beautiful they are.  Let's not be the ugly scary beast in their lives.  Let's help them see the true beauty that flows from them.   Let's be filled with love.  Let's share the love with others.  Soon everyone will be awesome!  Let's give people a reason to dance!!  Let's all put on God's glasses and change the stinkin' world!

You are loved.

You are treasured.

You are precious.

You were made to be awesome.

That is all.

Goodnight.

XOXO Katie

 

Real Talk ... Random Rant

Ok, people.  Let's get real here.  Do you ever feel like running away as fast and as far as humanly possible?  I mean forget about fighting the dragon named Life that's guarding the precious treasure of peace that awaits you in the highest room of the tallest tower.  Forget about the armies of evil that seem to surprise attack you with flying monkeys and swirling curses any chance they get.  I'm all for running away fast and furious to the comfort of what I know to be safe and sound.  I'm a damsel in distress here not a warrior with courage and guts and brains and whatever else a knight in shining

armor has.     

Life is one of the hardest things ever, and I've had it pretty good these last 23 (practically 23) years of living.  So why am I complaining when there are others who have had way worse cards dealt to them? 

I wouldn't say I'm complaining.  I'm more like acknowledging the fact that life sucks sometimes.  Lately I've been pondering way too deep of questions for my little brain to process overnight.  These life questions are consuming me, and knowing myself, it will drive me crazy not figuring out the answers until either the Good Lord reveals them to me.... or I die.  I'm praying for the first scenario.

I'll spare you all the excruciating detail of the questions that just make me want to run away forever and never look back, but through it all I've come to realize that I really only need one answer in life.... Jesus.  I know "Jesus" is the cliche answer to every Sunday School question, but seriously guys... Jesus is the answer to everything concerning life. 

Even though my mind can over think every possible situation, if the answer doesn't align with what Jesus taught me in the Bible then forget it.  Jesus isn't the master of confusion, He's the author of truth.  Life can be extremely confusing at times.  I mean, the world we live in now is just straight up terrible.  It's no wonder people get lost and confused all the time.  Even Christians.

I think I'm done ranting.  I just wanted to let you all know that everyone goes through times when they're trying to figure something out, whether that be concerning their faith, work, love or life.  Friends, just remember that in any area of struggle, Jesus is the answer.  If you place your delight in Him, He will purify your soul, give you peace, rest, and He will light your way in the dark. 

Life is hard, but don't run away like I want to at times.  I'm learning that sometimes the best thing to do is to be the knight in shining armor and not the damsel in distress.  To face that dragon and those flying monkeys straight on with courage and strength that can only come from the Lord Himself.  He'll protect you, and you'll win the ultimate treasure at the end of the story.  It may not be true love's kiss (but hey, I'm still holding out for that one!), but it could be the peace you've been longing for.  It could be the joy you've missed having in your heart.  I don't know what the treasure you're looking for is, but Jesus does. 

Good night friends.  Turn that mind off, and stop thinking.  Sleep well and fight hard.  I feel like I'm going to dream about dragons and sword fights and prince and princesses.  I think I'm still a toddler at heart.  Oh well. I <3 fairytales.

XOXO Katie

The Thoughtless Wanderer

Well this post is extremely overdue.  Shame on me for not keeping up with this.  I mean who doesn't want to read about the extreme randomness that flows through my head at any given moment?  But right now I'm having writer's block.  I've literally been sitting here staring at the blinking cursor for 27 minutes and 14 seconds and not a single thought has floated through my head.  My brain is all fuzzy and I feel like:

What the heck is wrong with me?

Sometimes I think that life gets way too much in the way.  I just want to karate chop it in the face and say, "Slow down, you fool!"  It then usually gets mad and speeds up even more.  What a gentleman.  

As I reflect on the last couple of months of my life, I feel like I have been running in circles not really accomplishing anything.  It's a terrible thing to feel, I know.  But sometimes I just can't help it.  I love my job, I love my friends, I kinda love grad school, and I love my family.

So what's the problem, you ask?? Well, I don't know.  You tell me.

I've been trying to fully grasp the concept of Philippians 4:11 "I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content in all circumstances".  But let me just say that the struggle is real.  Really real.  I want to know how Paul learned that!  As opposed to my very first blog post ever, Less Than Adventuresome, I've kind of learned how to go on adventures and actually love them!  (I'm not talking skydiving or swimming with sharks kind of adventure...baby steps people.)  It's hard to be content with life when I'm not seeing any of my kind of adventures become reality.  But hey, there's a time for everything and everything has its time.

I'm going to sign off as the Thoughtless Wanderer and leave this horrendous post to rest.  Maybe next week I'll be inspired to write something more beneficial and thought provoking.  But for now, I'm going to just live life and enjoy today, because no one is guaranteed tomorrow.

Keep dreaming and keep living, friends!

Katie xoxo

Gerard Butler, Snow White's Granddaughter, & Pumpkin Coffee

I am dating Gerard Butler a la 20 years younger.  He's perfect.  My own prince charming.  He's about to take me on a most precious date when my grandparents, Snow White and Prince Charming, decide to come over to my castle and greet us.  I find this unexpected visit delightful and quite normal despite the fact that my grandparents' physical conditions make them look like a fellow couple in their 20s.  All is right in the world as Snow White and I sip green tea and chat about the most recent books each of us has read while Prince Charming shares advice with young Gerard on being charming and how to treat his lady like the true princess that she is (that would be me!)

All of a sudden, a great gust of wind appeared and darkness fell over the land.  A storm the size of a tsunami came in and a woman that looked like the child of the wicked witch from the west and Regina the evil queen from Once Upon A Time popped up out of nowhere and tried to kill us all.  Fortunately, my Gerard is determined, brave and strong.  He fights off the evil being, saves the world and wins my heart all in the matter of 2 seconds.  He sweeps me off my feet, whisks me away to his castle and we lived happily ever after as king and queen.

Then I hear the sound of a drum and the world starts to shake violently.  I'm suddenly sucked up into the air, and after an exhausting struggle, I realize I'm lying in bed with my alarm going off and vibrating on my night stand.

AHHHH!  I just had the best dream in the entire history of dreams!  After I realized that I was just dreaming, I smashed my head back into my pillow whispering "go back to sleep, go back to sleep, go back to sleep".  Unfortunately, I have never had the ability to finish my dreams.  Stink.  I get up and decide that today is going to be a grand day.  I mean, the fact that I married Gerard Butler and was Snow White and Prince Charming's granddaughter for probably 2 whole minutes is enough to make for the best day ever!

Then I realized I'm not in fantasy land anymore.  I'm in the real world, facing real world problems and learning real world solutions.  UGH.  I don't know how many of you are in a 'growing' stage in life, but I sure am.  Throughout the current changes in my life, I've felt too young, not smart enough, not good enough... I've felt like a loser, failure and like a child playing 'grown-up'.

One day, I was having such a pity party for myself : I hated not feeling in control, like I didn't know anything, like I wasn't Miss Perfect anymore and God totally interrupted my party for one.  He took His glasses off and gently put them on my face.  It was out of nowhere that I was able to see myself like He sees me.  Yes, learning lessons and growing is hard work because God usually shows us something about ourselves that isn't pretty.  It amazes me that just when I think I know myself pretty well, God shows me something else I need to work on.  It's never ending.  But then again, being a Christian should never be ending.


On my way home from work this evening, I heard a song called "He Is With Us".  The lyrics of this song just melted me....

"We can trust our God
He knows what He's doing
Though it might hurt now
We won't be ruined
It might seem there's an ocean in between
But He's holding on to you and me
And He's never gonna leave, no
He is with us, He is with us
Always, always
He is with us, He is with us
Always"

Perfect.  He is with us... always.  Through everything we are going through.

Even though I didn't have the best day ever that I was so sure I was going to have, I ended it with a cup of pumpkin coffee (aka perfection in a cup) and the assurance from my real Hero that I will always be rescued and fought for no matter what challenges in life I may face.  And that, my dears, is my happy ending to today.  Don't ever give up, keep on fighting and going through the struggle because God is waiting for you at the finish line.  He is teaching you because He loves you.  Amen and amen!

Good night, friends!!  And dream crazy dreams!

xoxo Katie <3

I'm A Real {grown-up} Girl!

Just pause for one second.

Pour yourself a cup of coffee or a steaming cup of tea.

Find your favorite chair, and while you're there take a seat.

Because I've got the best story in town.  And I want to share it with you.

My story stars me as the main character and my God as the director.

If you remember my last post (ok maybe it was a couple posts ago) I was royally freaking out about finding a job.  I just couldn't see what God was doing or where God was taking me.  I was getting a little frustrated.  I just wanted to know!  Well, come to find out, God really does see the whole painting when we only see the first layer of paint.

Que the "Duh, Katie.  Everybody knows that" from the audience.

Yeah, well, it's easy to remember that when you're not freaking out about something (even something as small as where you are going to live in the very near and looming future).

The opening scene has me sitting on my big comfy lime green circle chair on a summery Friday night cuddled up in a blanket watching "Hitch" for the first time ever.  (Don't judge me)  During the movie, I hear my phone make the infamous text message tone, and I look to see who has contacted me.  My friend says that she has a friend who is looking to fill a job position at the company she works for.  My friend wants to know if I would be interested in her setting up an interview for me with her friend.

I jump at the chance to interview and get all psyched and prepared to go in for the big day.  I make the three hour trek back to the Chicago land area to interview for this position.  I can't go into all the details otherwise we will be here for five days, but let me just say that GOD PROVIDES!  I had three things on my mind that I constantly prayed about for 6 months when it came to moving back home and my career in general.

Those exact three things were answered during my interview without me even having to ask.

Um, what?

I was offered the job on the spot, and sobbed all the way home from the all-day long interview.  Why did I sob?  Because my heart was overflowing at the goodness and faithfulness of God.

Interview day!

Just wait, my story gets better.

I go back to my short term home, IWU, to finish working at my favorite coffee shop, McConn Coffee Co.  My last day working at McConn is Friday, July 26th.  My first day of my new career is Monday, July 29th.  My fear of going months and months without a job after graduation is now zapped into thin air never to steal one more minute of peaceful slumber from me again.

I arrive at my new workplace starting my life as a working, professional business woman and learn that I get to make my very first business trip six days after my debut.

I'm shaking in my shoes with excitement and terror at the thought of flying alone, getting a hotel, calling for cabs and meeting what seems like a million strangers (soon to be familiar co-workers), navigating myself around a city I've never been to (without getting lost --- Heaven help me), and flying home.

I can do this.  I have confidence in me.  I start my adventure by driving to Midway airport.

Que "I Have Confidence" music:

The lyrics of this song start flowing through my mind...

"What will this day be like?  I wonder.  What will my future be?  I wonder.  It could be so exciting, to be out in the world to be free.  My heart should be wildly rejoicing, oh what's the matter with me?  I've always longed for adventure, to do the things I've never dared.  Now here I'm facing adventure, then why am I so scared?!

A flight all by myself.  What's so fearsome about that?

Oh, I must stop all these doubts, all these worries.  If I don't I just know I'll turn back."

Yep.  Julie Andrews narrated my whole weekend.  She reminded me to have confidence in myself.  I owe her huge.

Needless to say, I survived my first trip alone.  I didn't get lost.  I actually loved it and decided that I want to travel more often!

Corporate trip #1! 

I think I'm a big girl now.  No more comfort zone living.  I have been stepping out of my comfort zone for the past two weeks and God has been with me every single second.  During the sermon I listened to this morning, I was reminded that when we pray, God is right next to us.  The General of the Heavenly Host is standing right next to us whispering in our ears and hearts, "I'm right here.  Let's go do this.  We can conquer anything.  I'm on your side and will fight right next to you".

I don't know about you, but when I need to fight against doubt, fear, lies and oppression, I'm super glad and relieved that my God will be right next to me.  He will answer my prayers, provide in ways I never could have imagined and love me no matter what.

Now that my story is coming to an end, I just want to leave you with this reminder....

When God holds the pen to YOUR story, the plot changes and changes, but He remains constant and stable.  Trust and believe in God.  Sometimes it's hard and not fun, but trust me friend.  It's way worth it when He shows more of the painting He is working that is called Your Life.  He will answer your prayers, provide in ways you never could have imagined and love you no matter what.

Sleep well, dream big dream, and trust that God has your life in the tender palm of His mighty hand!

Monster's {YOU}niversity

Twelve years ago, I was sitting in a big red chair with a small bag of popcorn on my lap, my feet barely touching the ground of the movie theater, and my legs swinging in impatient anticipation.  Let me tell you, this movie was the talk of the summer.  Humor, monsters, Disney and Pixar combined...  My ten year old mind almost burst with excitement as family and friends waited for the lights to dim and the previews to start.  Monsters, Inc. was going to be awesome! 

I remember as the opening credits came on all the way until the closing credits came on feeling and looking something like this:

 I. Loved. That. Movie.

So, naturally after going through twelve years of life -- all the way through junior high, high school and college -- when I found out there was a Monsters, Inc. II coming out, my ten-year-old heart jumped in excitement and joy.  Finally!  Get out of the way kids, I've been waiting twelve years for this!  You better believe I was first in line; these kids just wouldn't understand.

Being one of the oldest in the theater without a child as my excuse of paying to see a G rated movie, my 22-year-old mind digested the movie a bit differently than my 10-year-old mind did.  This movie was awesome!  Because life had thrown me some minor curve balls during those 12 years in between movies, I was able to watch the movie with an objective mind and relate to it quite well. 

You see, I just graduated from college.  It was only three years ago that I had the same feelings that Mike Wazowski and James Sullivan felt during the movie. 

Will I fit in?

What if I fail?

I have to prove myself to everyone I encounter!

Et cetera . Et cetera. Et cetera.

I left the theater feeling so motivated and inspired to follow my dreams.  There have been plenty of people who have told me that I can't do something, leaving me feeling even more stubborn and determined to prove them wrong.  But even though I put on that facade in front of the nay-sayers and scooby-don'ts, it's still discouraging to hear someone tell me to my face that I can't accomplish a certain dream of mine.

Granted, there are only three people (four including God) in this whole world who know what I truly wish to accomplish with my life.  I've been blessed, or cursed... depends on how you look at it, with a dreamer-like personality.  I can literally sit in my room and dream and scheme for HOURS about what I'm going to do with my life, how it's going to look and all the in between stuff.  It's a blessing because when I'm bored (which happens a lot), I find something new to do.  It's a curse because I sometimes overwhelm myself with my imagination --- I don't know where to start!!  I can do anything I want, which results in me telling people that I have no idea what I want.  It's because I want it ALL!  

*Spoiler Alert* Mike Wazowski faced failure and rejection at almost every point in his life.  He wasn't scary, he was forgotten and destined to be anything BUT a "scarer".  Even the Dean of the Scare School told Mike he wasn't cut out to be a "scarer", that he didn't belong at Monsters University.  How devastating. But that just pushed him to work harder and prove to himself and everyone else that he could do what he always dreamed of, what he was passionate about.  He always stood up for himself and the underdog, because he understood what it meant to be an underdog.  James Sullivan was popular, scary and outgoing.  People expected him to be a great "scarer" --- he didn't even have to try. 

Throughout the whole movie, Sully learns what it's like to stand up for other people and to do the right thing.  He got kicked out of the fraternity he was in because Mike out (book) smarted him during his final.  Although Mike and Sully are enemies for a good portion of the movie --- always competing and never working together --- they learn to work as a team, accomplishing the same goal: to get back into the scare program. 

It just warmed my heart to see a solid movie with valuable life lessons being shown.  Even this 22-year-old college graduate learned something from this movie: Never back down.  Never give up.  Believe in yourself.  Believe in others.  Do good.  Live life to the fullest.  Be you.

So folks, I don't know about you, but I'm going to start RIGHT NOW pursuing and living my dream.  Those three people in my life will just have to keep me accountable.  Who knows, maybe you all will know what my dream is soon!

Following my dream,

Kate
 

When I grow up, I wanna be...

Lately there have been many days where I find myself sitting on the couch staring at the wall thinking about life.  Totally lost in thought, I spend hours just rabbit-trailing down paths and imagining scenarios that may never even happen.  Let me give you a glimpse into my mind: I'm in the middle of a book titled 48 Days To The Work You Love.  This book is good for many reasons, but the main reason why I love it is because it forces me to think about what I'm good at.  While I'm reading this, I'm imagining myself being a famous author, wealthy businesswoman, heck, even a dentist.  (Have I gone to med school? NO.  Did I pass any of my science classes? BARELY.)  But I still imagine it, because I like to give things a try, and I believe that I can do anything.

Ironically, the last post I made was all about my college experience and how graduating was simply awesome.  But now I'm thinking that I just want to do what I'm good at, not what I learned in a classroom.  Yes, I have quite a bit of unforgettable knowledge thanks to my professors, but I can't shake the feeling that I'm suppossed to be doing more with my life than just making ends meet and living a so-so life.  I want to do more!  But the question now is, "What?!'  What is it that I'm supossed to do?  I have no idea.

Remember in middle school when your teacher would have you take out a piece of paper and have you write down at least five things you thought you were good at --- five talents you believed you possessed?  For me that was always hard.  I would turn to my best friend and ask her what talents I had.  I couldn't see what she saw.  It was always easier for me to write down what talents other people had.

Now, 15 some years later, this book is forcing me to look objectively at myself and pick out what talents I have.  This is awesome, because the more I do it, the more I learn about what I like to do and what I'm good at!  I have learned that I can create a career out of things that I love to do and be happy.  I don't have to be a part of a cookie-cutter society and follow everyone else.  I've never been one to follow the crowd.  The thought of having to join a corporation because it's the predictable thing to do makes me not want to do it.  (But that just may be the ignorance speaking...)

Talking with six or seven year-olds, they all know what they want to do with their lives.  (Or at least have an idea).  Cashier, hairstylist, grocery bagger.  These are all occupations that I hear little ones say they want to be.  When asked why they say, "Because I like scanning items", "Because I like counting money" "Because I like making people look good" "Because I like organizing" --- responses that tell of what talents they have.  They pick these professions because it's all they know at that stage in life.  It's what they like... what they are interested in.

Why can't I be more like a seven year old?  They don't care about the societal position of their job; they claim their position with pride because they want to do what they like.  I don't want to hate my job.  I want to wake up excited to go to work.  I want to enjoy the life that God gave me.  That's why it's taken me so long to figure out what I'm going to do now.  I may not have all of the answers, but one I thing I know for sure:

When I grow up...

I don't want to be what other people expect me to be.

I don't want to be living another person's dream.

I want to live my dream and use the talents God gave me for His purpose.

Whether that be running my own business, working for a small company or even a big one.  Who knows?!  It's all a question mark right now, but at least I know one thing.  Nobody can tell me what or who I'm suppossed to be anymore.

When I grow up, I wanna be me.